i don't know what it is about right now, maybe too much Grey paint. maybe its the trash thats bagged up waiting for me to take it out to the dumpster that i didn't put out. did i try hard enough? these are the days for breaking down. i think i'm coming undone. its sunny outside and im still cold. its just one of those days. really someone come save my life, maybe one day ill sleep when i die. i just dont get it all right now. why is it swallowing me. you can see it in my face. you ask are you ok, and i say yeah what are you talking about, when really you know and it scares the fucking hell out of me. im starting to show? is that how bad things have gotten. i want to know so badly. please make it stop. cant i just stop breathing just for a while.
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