ill get fucked up

I'm so fucking sick of hearing your voice-mail. get your shit together, maybe you could have sent me an email at least, if your phone died. its up to you now.

walking in the country side, it seems that the winds have stopped, i took down my posters

i remember moments of happiness endless summer and acoustic guitars. things are complicated and im glad i didn't lash out back at you, just stop having to be sorry for things. i wish i was a cast away on a warm ocean waiting for a pourpose to rise. they say its not becomming. i decided not to weat the blazer, but now i just look like every ohter twenty something girl whos into music and got to heavy. dont even try to deny it or say anything becuase im the one who knows me. im not unhappy, just unhappy songs make me happy. in some twisted little world i think that works. my mouth tastes like chicken, and our patterns dont match. ive got a chinese hat in my closet i forgot about. i want to wear sandles, but i know i need to wear shoes. i watched harry potter 5 the other night and i cryed. you know that part when voldomort was possessing harry, but then harry realized he had love in this life, yeah thats the part. lol im so corny. i want you to toughen up. i feel like a little thing, when things go sour, and i loose my voice. i just need time to say what i need to say, even if you try to pretend apologies work as well as you think they do. thing is i forgive everyone, i make everyone feel like whatever they did is ok, and i dont care, i just dont want the drama, and i guess i did it this time too. just makes me think, how much would it really take. thats one line ill never cross again.

wake me up when you come to bed

maybe at least if you have some support to your argument i could actually give you a chance. i should be sleeping, fuck i have to be up early. Tuesday is a weird day for me. im always stuck on my old schedule for a month it seems, till i develop a new one. my texting frustrates the fuck out of me. work is also a pain in the ass. their is no consistancy, im used to things being finished and done, and it just doesn't happen. gotta sleep soon...

im figgin tired

like heaven needs the morning

Here comes that feeling I've seen in your eyes

Back in the old days, before the hard times

But I'm not afraid anymore

It's only a broken heart



I know the place where you keep your secrets

Out of the sunshine, down in a valley

But I'm not afraid anymore

It's only a broken heart



What would I give, to start all over again

To clean up my mistakes



Stand in the moonlight, stand under heaven

Wait for an answer, hold out forever

But don't be afraid anymore

It's only a broken heart



What would I give, to start all over again

To clean up my mistakes



I know your weakness, you've seen my dark side

The end of the rainbow is always a long ride

But I'm not afraid anymore

It's only a broken heart

everything is on fire

im at work and all the computers went down, on joy, its not been the best day at work. tomorow im going to the doctor at ten to get stuff dealt with, and then im seeing stuart. stupid thing is that the forcast for tomorow is rain. only day this week is suposed to rain all day. Yesterday i remebered why i dont wear shirts with cleavge. my facebacomes un noticeable. i went to wash my car at washworld, and the guy was so creepy i decided to leave. i got a new bag. its ok, im not in an impressed mood, and i dont know if its becuase of my lack of vacation fro my own life on tuesdays but im not in the best mood. id rather just have this week done already, lucky for me it pratically is now. this weekend is devoted to my soc paper, oh joy. oh well. at least its not huge huge but still, and im going to have to even bind the stupid thing into a book and do illistrations, and watercolors etc. ugh. NO more school please.

what is really the point if everything just changes and gets harder anyways.