why is it whenever you want soemthing it dosnet want you and as soon as your finishes it comes back for love. ugh my cat proves this hypothesis correct. at 4 am after going back to sleep i had these crazy dream fantasy's. where my real feelings just were out their and i was going to act on them. somehow i thought i could have a relationship without actually having to have an emotional connection. and with someone i wouldn't be with becuase that doesn't happen. idk what my sleep brain was thinking and then we all were snowboarding and i had white snow boarding pants but i almost lost the keys to the yaris and we were all on anymore even though i dont snowboard. and the other night i had giant hands. idk whats up with my dreams. and im afraid of this pain, and what it could mean
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